For this year’s Mental Health Week, we’re focusing on nervous system expansion beyond regulation. Which is to say – increasing our capacity to lean into hard things in order to grow.
First regulation, then expansion.
The theme for this year, set by the Mental Health Foundation, is Belonging Matters. Connections matter. Community matters. A sense of belonging is not just a nice thing to have; it’s an essential aspect of our mental health.
But what if isolation and loneliness are exacerbated by social anxiety?
Before we can connect with others more authentically, we must first know how to connect with our own bodies.
Step One: Regulation (safety).
Step Two: Expansion (reaching out).
“When we begin to understand ourselves better through our own playful self-discovery (rather than being told who we should be via social media/societal expectations), we naturally lean more into our true authenticity and our joy.” - Arti Jalan
There is a lot of talk around regulation and plenty of tools that you’re probably familiar with, like elongating your exhales and walking barefoot on the ground. This is wonderful, and it’s also good to know that we’re not supposed to always be regulated. It’s very normal to get activated.
Activation can actually be reframed as excitement.
However, if you’re living in survival mode, it's practically impossible to access the ability to reframe it that way. Once we’ve learnt how to regulate our nervous system out of fight or flight and into rest and digest, then we can get to know our authentic selves – the self that is not always running from a tiger.
“Nervous system expansion isn't necessarily about becoming calmer, rather just open. If we can grow our capacity to stay open, we begin playing with the fabric of life, learning about what we like and don't like.” - Arti Jalan
The ability to regulate and access our authentic selves gives us the confidence to connect with others. Thus, the ability to build our community and sense of belonging. Not to mention the ability to play, explore, and try something new. To expand.
Spring Expansion: A Ritual
Show your nervous system that it is safe to try something new or lean into something hard.
-
Bring to mind something that you’ve been putting off or avoiding, or something that you’d love to try, but the fear thwarts any attempt to take the first step.
-
Something that makes you a little nervous.
-
Simply notice your somatic response to the thought of it.
-
What are three steps that you could take to get you closer to something new? Write the 2nd and 3rd steps down in your planner or calendar.
-
Take the first step now.
-
Go slow and breathe through any activation.
-
It can help to close your eyes and place your hands on your belly and chest to feel your breath.
-
Count nine breaths.
-
After nine breaths feel free to go about your day or if you have time and want to go deeper, then repeat the ritual.
This is how you expand your nervous systems' capacity to try new things or lean into hard things. This article was inspired by a recent newsletter ‘How much life can you hold? by Arti Jalan, Forage & Sustain.
